I know it's been forever since I last blogged. It's been a crazy summer. Good but crazy. I ended up breaking my foot at the beginning of July. My weight loss had already stalled, and I knew that the summer could be disasterous if I wasn't able to move around much. One night while I was having an extremely bad pity party, I admitted to my husband, and more importantly myself that I couldn't do it on my own. I'm a food addict. I know a lot of people who are overweight throw that term around, but for me it's true. I would have a panic attack while trying to avoid buying a bag of chips at the checkout line. I would go through the drive thru, order an extra value meal, scarf it down in my car and throw away the evidence so no one would know. I was a closet eater. It was an incredibly hard thing to admit, let alone tell someone else, even my husband. That night, he offered to take over my food, he asked me to give him 2 months to see if he could get the scale to move. In a moment of desperation, I agreed. That was July 17th.
That night, I got on the scale and weighed 198.4. That was not a good number. The next day Kevin dowloaded the Lose It app on my phone and set out a plan. The goal was to get to 155 by my birthday in January. He started planning and fixing my meals, as well as tracking my calories for me. The only stipulation on our deal was that I couldn't cheat. If he didn't plan it or pack it for me, I couldn't eat it without clearing it with him first.
I knew it wasn't going to be easy. The first few weeks were rough, although I handled it better than either one of us thought I would. It helped a lot that I was imobile because of the broken foot. I was cranky. I had cravings. I shed several tears. But the scale was moving down. That was my motivation.
After a few weeks, it started to get easier. The cravings started to subside, and we actually found healthy meal options that I liked. For me, it's important to enjoy what I'm eating. If I don't enjoy it, I won't eat it for long. I still got to have my "cheats"...wings, hamburgers, pizza...but I knew that I had to report my calories for the day to Kevin, so I made sure to plan for every bite of it.
It's been a little over 2 months now and I've lost 15.7 pounds (182.7). We still plan meals together, but I am tracking everything myself. I refer to that first month as my "cleanse". He got me off all of the junk. Now, if I eat more than 1 bad meal a week I get sick, and I don't enjoy that feeling. I still have bad days. I don't know that the day will ever come when I don't have issues with my food. But I have an amazing support system, and I know with Kevin's help that I can do it.
My next goal is getting back into the gym. It's been almost 11 weeks since I broke my foot, and I'm still in my boot. I'm slowly working my way into a tennis shoe, but it's a very slow process. I tested it this morning, and I can get on the eliptical with my boot on, so I have no excuses now. Day one at the gym is Tuesday. I'm only holding myself accountable for going 30 minutes twice a week. I'm basically starting all over again, and I don't want to injur myself or burn myself out right off the bat. I also need to establish a good routine over the next month because I start grad school at the end of October. If I get in the habit now, it will be a lot harder to use the homework excuse for skipping the gym.
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